You know it’s never fun to have your life in plain view… I’ve always felt like I’ve been in a looking glass. When it seemed like I was going through the hardest things that there were so many people who could see it happen. It never happened privately… I remember always praying in those moments… Sometimes I didn’t have the right attitude or say the right thing.. I remember repenting and asking the Lord to help me to be a better person…I remember feeling like I was so prideful and hated that about myself..
Everyone has their own road to travel, their own course to complete. I am starting to accept the fact that I will never understand why some things happen like they do. God has a perfect plan. Sometimes we go through things because we are not obedient or don’t have faith but His intention is never to hurt us. When we go through hard things we have to lean on Him and have faith that He is working it out.
Have you ever completely just made a mess of a situation and just could not fix it? Did not know how it could ever be repaired. Well, right now that is where I am at. I know some things were my fault and some that were not and some just happened but I understand that ALL THINGS work together for good to them that love God and them who are the called according to His purpose.. I know that and that is what keeps me going…Knowing that He loves me and He knows that this is painful. In this I am having to trust Him and wait and let Him have His way.
I just feel like He’s trying to turn it around for me if I would just let Him…I’m trying everyday to let Him have his way.. To put me in the right place at the right time…
Daily I’m surrendering in prayer and letting myself change in this. It has been the most fulfilling thing I could ever imagine.
II Chronicles 7:11-16
“When Solomon had finished the temple of the Lord and the royal palace, and had succeeded in carrying out all he had in mind to do in the temple of the Lord and in his own palace, 12 the Lord appeared to him at night and said:
“I have heard your prayer and have chosen this place for myself as a temple for sacrifices.
13 “When I shut up the heavens so that there is no rain, or command locusts to devour the land or send a plague among my people, 14 if my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land. 15 Now my eyes will be open and my ears attentive to the prayers offered in this place. 16 I have chosen and consecrated this temple so that my Name may be there forever. My eyes and my heart will always be there.”